Space for Men in the Church

Lessen the Pressure


Are you looking for ways to encourage greater involvement from the men in your congregation? A variety of reasons could be motivating the men in your church to remain at a aloof, especially if involvement means personal vulnerability. In this post created in cooperation with the Association of Biblical Counselors, Tim Watson, describes ways in which churches can create space for men to learn the importance of being present with another and allowing organic vulnerability to develop over time.

Tim Watson is a Licensed Professional Counselor at Metroplex Counseling in Fort Worth and Bedford, Texas. He is a member of the Association of Biblical Counselors and the American Association of Christian Counselors. His counseling focus includes men's issues, marriage and family, adolescents, addictions, anxiety, stress, grief and trauma. 



In the process of creating programs within the church, we have a tendency to gravitate towards what we think will produce the fastest results. But relationships take time because maturing alongside one another is a lifelong journey. Churches need to create space enough to foster enduring relationships for men.

Tim cautioned against programs that require immediate vulnerability on the part of men. In what ways do you think removing the pressure of instant openness would help the men in your church to pursue friendships with one another? How might it create a more inviting environment for them to grow in relationship?
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What programs does your church have in place to encourage men into friendships with one another? How successful have they been? In what ways could they be improved?
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Tim highlighted the importance of presence. Scaling back expectations can create an environment for men to be present with one another in an authentic manner. What does your church have in place to encourage relational presence? What changes could you make to create space for men to be present with one another? How might this benefit the congregation as a whole?
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Creating spaces like Tim described means surrendering the expectation for immediate results. It means that you may need to scale back your goals. But it will go a long way in showing the men of your congregation that you care for their maturity enough to create an environment in which they can learn to thrive. Look for ways to apply the lessons Tim shared to the programs in your church. Be intentional about creating space for men to enjoy friendships with one another and learn to depend on each other for the sake of their spiritual growth.


For more insights and teaching from Tim Watson, check out the full course, A Vigilant Heart


To find out more about the Association of Biblical Counselors, click here.